Coaching Texas Flag Football, Building Character

After accepting a new job, I packed up my stuff, and my dog and I jumped into my dark red Hyundai Sonata, windows tinted so dark you couldn’t see a damn thing through them on we headed straight to our new home Austin, Texas

Any city I move to, I try to do two things:

1. Volunteer in the community

2. Meet new people.

   
   

One day, I was driving around town in that Sonata—windows down, my dog (aka "The Governor") hanging his head out the back window, slobber flying all over my car, when I started wondering how I could get involved in this new city.

I pulled up to a red light and saw a sign:"NFL Little League Flag Football – Coaches Needed." With a number to text.

I thought, Hell, I like football. I'd be happy to help some kids get outdoors.And what better way to experience Texas than by diving headfirst into football?

I texted the number. No reply.

A month later, I randomly got a link to join the coaches' meeting.With no other information. 

I wasn’t  even positive my original text went through and hadn’t thought about it since,  but I joined anyway.

About 80 coaches were on the call, going over rule changes and expectations for the upcoming season. 

The guy leading it was named Hector.

I messaged him afterward:“Hey Hector, I volunteered to coach but haven’t heard anything. Do I have a team?”

“What’s your son’s name?” he asked.“No kids, sir. Just here to help.”

That threw him off. “Oh, well… we’ll let you know if we need you.”

Didn’t sound promising so I let it go, not very invested or optimistic. 

Then, a week later—ring ring—“Hey buddy, it’s Hector. You still want to coach?”

“Sure do.”

“You’re coaching the 49ers—11 and 12-year-olds. First game’s next Saturday. I’m sending you the roster now.”  

Just like that, I was the coach.

I emailed the parents, introduced myself, and let them know we’d have fun, but we’d also be playing to win.

Immediately, I started getting emails:“My son has a great arm—he should be QB,” and so on.

We’re only allowed to have one practice each week and with us getting a late start that meant only one practice before the first game. All 10 kids showed up—8 boys, 2 girls.It was chaos.

One kid told me, “I’ve played six seasons and won five of them.” Great. But we didn’t even have time to install real plays.

But unfortunately that was the exception. Half of the kids had never played football before.

Game 1: We face the Saints.

We’re on the field waiting. Suddenly, music plays When the Saints Go Marching In.

They come running through a fan tunnel, head coach in full Saints gear.

My time and I just watched, we didn’t even know each other’s names and they choreographed their entrance. 

35–0 at halftime.

Refs call the game. Mercy rule.

That didn’t sit well with me.

I gathered the parents. We’d need extra practice, even if it had to be “unofficial.”

“We’ll keep our Thursday practice, but I’ll just happen to be out here  Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays too.” Providing no expectation for them to join but a simply offering on where i’ll be in case they did want to practice

Everyone was frustrated and I certainly felt in over my head but my own frustration covered this. 

Then one parent chimed in, “Coach, can we also talk about what we did well?”

Now in hindsight, I probably shouldn’t of said this, but I wanted to make it very clear that this was not ok and we certainly were not going to have a season like this

So I followed with a “Good point. Everyone, next week let’s work on doing something well so we have good things we can talk about after the game” 

Afterward, walking to my car Hector caught up with me and asked  how it went.

I told him disappointedly.

He nodded. “Yeah… I figured that might happen.”

“What do you mean?” I asked

“Well Nick, you’re not from around here, are you?” He said as if that wasn't clear

“No sir.” I said still upset with the game

“See, in Texas, things work a little differently. Coaches don’t get assigned players. They recruit. From age five. And they keep those players every year until they age out in highschool” He Continued

“So… every team we’re playing has been together for six years?” - I interjected

He had nothing else to say accept a “Yup.” that sounded real similiar to you're screwed

Fucking Texas, man.

Week 2: parents are buzzing—texting me, giving advice, suggesting where their kids should play.I planned, drew a new playbook and we got much stricter at practice. The kids responded well. 

But I could feel the shift. skeptical parents turning into doubtful ones.

Game day was a mess. One girl forgot a cleat. One single cleat. Another forgot their flags. One family went to the wrong field.

Still, I made a call to put one of the girls at QB. She couldn’t throw far but she was accurate. 

Some parents questioned this (this was originally a boys-only league), but I was glad the girls were there. They played hard and had the right mindset.

She threw five touchdowns. Zero interceptions. We won by two scores.

We were on to something

After the game? Parents were filled with hope and the kids excitement.

Snacks and drinks came out (apparently a post-win ritual). Parents congratulated me:“Didn’t think you could do it.”“Keep it up”

I was still hard on the kids, but they were having fun. That balance matters. And now, I had the parents behind me.

Week 3: Absolute disaster.

• One kid out for the season with a hospital bound illness.

• I broke my clipboard over my knee after a bad call

• My six-season vet broke his wrist.His dad said, “He’ll be back next week—he can’t break it again!”The league said otherwise.

• One kid with a bloody face and broken tooth.

• One of the girls broke down crying in the huddle

• Two parents ( from different families) got ejected.

• We lost.

  
  

And kept losing.

We ended season 1–6.

Hector came up to me after the season:“Don’t worry, next season we’ll put you with the 5-year-olds. You can start building your dynasty.”

Yeah… I wasn’t interested in coaching toddlers.

I was pretty done with this, it wasn’t that I didn’t want to coach, I just didn’t want to start with 5 year olds. 

Couple months later—ring ring.

It’s Hector.

“Coach backed out. Team might get split up unless someone steps in. 11 and 12 year-olds again. You in?”

I wasn’t thrilled but I believe in rec sports.

And I couldn’t let the team fall apart just because I didn’t feel like coaching.

“Alright Hector. I’m in. But I need some help man, do you have anyone that would be an assistant coach.”

He agreed and said this year I'd be coaching the Packers.

This time was different. I came in with an absolute no-nonsense mindset.

We held a team meeting.

“ First, let me address the parents. I don’t care what position you want your kid to play. If the kids feels they'd help the team more by playing certain position then they can tell me themselves and earn it in practice. We’re here to win.”

One familiar face: Sterly. He wasn’t a star, but brought energy and heart. I made him our hype man and he ran motivational speeches, chants, circle breakouts. 

Rest of the team was a mixed bag. Some came from other leagues, some cut from other teams.

We had two top talents:

• Brayden: Committed to the game, wanted to play pro. Tall. 

• Miles: a speed demon playing in three leagues. 

  
  

I said Miles we still need a good QB so we’re going to rotate folks until we find one. You start us off. 

“No sir,” he said. “All I do is catch touchdowns”

I said “excuse me?”

Taken back by his boldness. 

He said “Sir, all I do is catch touchdowns. If it goes up, I’ll bring it down”

I thought this was absolutely wild but hell let’s try it. 

Turns out, he was right. Kid caught absolutely everything.

Still, we needed a QB.

I moved Brayden to QB which he did not like but played extremely well. 

His dad came up to me afterwards and said Coach, Brayden’s a wide receiver. We have a personal coach to help him at wide receiver 

I said that’s what he told me, this season he’s going to play QB. He’s a great WR and a great QB, right now we need the QB more. 

The dad, looked at my inquisitively and asked, “you think he can play QB?” 

I said, he’s going to be a winning QB

His dad looked back at Brayden and ushered him along. 

I called some of my old players. Joseph, already on another team. The girls, recruited by an all-girls league.Pedro,my Italian defensive captain? “Coach, I’m in.” Absolutely what I need. Kid played well on offense but nothing would piss this kid of more than missed flag pulls.

Really amazing to see this quiet kid, speak with such authority when on defense coordinating the other players. 

Hector also found me an assistant—Coach D.

Kinesiology major, wanted to coach high school someday. We met at a bar, aligned instantly. Good cop/bad cop. I’d run the structure and strategy of the team; he’d upskill the kids.

We built a playbook that night, crafted drills, and got to work.

First official practice, we got organized. Ran drills. Scrimmaged.

Every dropped pass = 10 pushups for the offense.Every missed flag = 10 pushups for the defense.

First game.

First play: dropped pass. Our team drops and does pushups—without me even saying a word.

That’s culture.

Although I was frustrated and yelling “This is a game, get up!” 

We won. Mercy rule. Halftime.

Sterly scored his first TD—nickname: “Randy Moss.”

Opposing coach called Brayden “a mini Tom Brady.”

His dad turns to me: “We’re switching his trainer to focus on throwing.”

We win the next two games.

The breakthrough?

After game 3, I saw one of our players tossing the ball with a massive kid. Cannon for an arm.

I thought, man if we could get this kid to join the team as QB then we could have two all-stars at wide receiver.

I look over at my player’s dad and said  “Hey, how old is that kid”

He looked back and replied “How old do you want him to be”

I said “Well, he can be as old as 12 to play on our team”.

His dad said “Then he’s 12”. 

He became our QB.

Miles and Brayden at WR? Unstoppable.

We won every single game. All the way to the Super Bowl.

At the Super Bowl, we lost by one score to a six-year dynasty team.

But we fought hard. And these kids learned what it meant to commit, to work, and to win together.

I was really proud of the culture we built. It’s easy to go out there and kick around not really doing much. But building individually to become a stronger collective builds foundational life principals. 

Throughout the season

We scrimmaged older teams, brought in UT college players to run drills, and had a ton of fun but maintained a no nonsense culture.

Not sure what’s next, but that season? That’s a hard one to top.